Early in my childhood and adolescent years, feelings of shame or guilt was normal to me. I don’t if it came from the constant bullying at school, the feeling of rejection from family members for no valid reason, or witnessing my single-mom go through sufferings from the people she loved and trusted the most. I don’t know where it all began but I knew the feelings where there and I didn’t know how to release it.
For many years I suppressed my feelings, wants, and desires and conformed into a person I didn’t recognize. I suppressed ideas and beliefs people projected on to me, thinking that was going to lead me to the road of success. I had built so much self-hatred I began to project my feelings onto everyone, I started getting into fights, judging others, and I had zero empathy for anyone. Over time this became a weight I could no longer bare. I began to suffer deep depression at the age of 23, It was my end point, I got fed up of pretending to be someone I was not. I began the journey of self-love and for the first time allowed myself to love who I was. I began my selfish phase, prioritizing self- acceptance and compassion. I embraced my inner darkness and finally started expressing an appreciation for myself that I didn’t know existed.
Shadow work is vital for growth, to peel of the layers of conditioning and old personal dogmas creating new ideas of self. To be enlightened is to intertwine light and shadow, being spiritual does not mean only light, it's about the yin and the yang and integrating both in your life, that is the highest version of self.
What is the shadow?
The shadow is the dark side. The shadow represents a cluster of various parts hidden within your psyche.
Where is the shadow?
Pay close attention, you can train yourself to notice your shadow when you witness strong negative emotional responses to others. Everything that irritates us about others is a reflection of ourselves, Any Fears comes from the UNCONSCIOUS mind a.k.a you shadow-self. any trait of yourself you suppress, the subconscious mind is your shadow.
Embracing the shadow
Accepting the feelings, thoughts and process so we may allow the subconscious to unfold and LOVE THAT PART OF OURSELVES, THAT IS HOW WE CAN EMBRACE SHADOW SELF. Releasing and clearing the dark side of self allowing a space to adapt and transform to our Highest Selves. As you integrate your shadow self, you’re approaching your authentic self, which gives you a more realistic assessment of who you are. Cultivate Self-Compassion Instead of just ignoring your pain with a “stiff upper lip” mentality, stop to tell yourself “this is really difficult right now,” how can I comfort and care for myself at this moment? by cultivating self-awareness we can reflect and explore the deepest part of our psyche.
This part of spirituality can be described by the tower card in the tarot deck. This work will help us become empowered and become centered. Should we choose to do this shadow healing we can be empowered.
WRITE IT DOWN
Take an honest look at your attitudes, behaviors, dark thoughts, and emotions. keeping a journal to record your new discoveries about yourself is a remedy. Writing your insights and reviewing them later helps encode the discovery into your awareness.
Honour your needs
HONORING your truth and nature without limitations. Shadow work can de-condition old beliefs systems and personal truths THAT NO LONGER SERVE YOU. Release and heal. be honest with yourself, self reflect and ask yourself what makes you happy. Honor and accept your humanness.Practice Mindfulness and self-expression, do things that make you feel good. if you have time to meditate great, if you can’t try to take a pause in your day and take a couple of deep breaths. this helps with grounding yourself if your having a difficult day.
Lastly I only recommend doing shadow work if you are confident and secure with how the feel as an individual. If you suffer from any anxiety or insecurity doing shadow work can make you feel worse not better. You have to be mentally strong to face the hard truths about yourself and prepared to eliminate what no longer serves you.
Crystals such as Black Obsidian can assist on your journey to shadow work.
Ruled by the planet Pluto, Black Obsidian is a teacher stone and could be deemed the “Warrior of Truth.” It is the most powerful of the Obsidian’s and does not cater to the ego; rather it exposes darkened areas of the subconscious to force one to face one’s true self. It assists in examining unresolved issues and harmful attitudes inhibiting one’s personal and spiritual growth. Black Obsidian works quickly and can be overwhelming as it rushes negative emotions and difficult truths to the surface to be experienced and released. It should only be used if one is educated on its power and prepared to withstand the process in order to achieve deep healing. It is best used under the guidance of a qualified therapist or healer, and other, gentler forms of Obsidian may be used for this process. Black Obsidian also carries the inherent frequency of protection, sealing the aura and removing energetic attachments, hooks and cords, as well as eliminating negative energies within the self